My First Confession!

Posted by Dar | September 16, 2009 .

I guess I will use my first post to tell a little bit about myself and how I got here...Hey, my first confession! I have struggled with my weight all my life. I can tell you the good fat from bad fat, the good carbs from bad carbs, the good oils from bad oils, the good sweetners from bad sweetners and yes, the good food from bad food! It's hard to believe by looking at me that I KNOW what's healthy and what's not. I have been on every diet there is. I have sweated to the oldies, stopped the insanity, and busted and flushed the fat. I have been to South Beach and back. Along the way I stopped in the Mediterranean, L A, and Shangri La. I have been in the zone and a watcher of weight . I have been promised a Flat Belly, a Best Life, and a Body for Life. I have eaten this and not that and I have even eat right for my type! Yep, I have been around the diet block. And if you understood or smiled at what I just said....You Get It....You may have traveled the same journey with me. But you know what is really scary? I lost weight on every one of those diets! The problem is after every diet, I gained it all back plus 10 or more pounds.

You know, I love being a woman, but I am tired of that damn "W" being beside my size! So I am back now and am Fired Up! I have added this blog to the weapons arsenal in this battle of fat and fit. This war isn't going to be easy but I am going to make it fun! I started Weight Watchers again on 12/13/08 at my highest weight ever! I am sad to say, I am a WW repeat offender! I can count 6 times that I have started Weight Watchers and quit before my 16 weeks and before my 10%. So here I am, I made it past 16 weeks but I got within 3 pounds of my 10% and have started sliding back. I haven't been following the program like I should and the last three weigh-in's have been gains. My only saving grace is that I have been going to the meetings at least twice a month. I have a wonderful leader and some great friends (including my sister) at my meetings. I think this has really helped keep me from getting back on the run away train.

I have this feeling I might fear success? Can you really fear such a thing when it is all you really want?

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13 Comments so far

AMW September 21, 2009 11:46 am

I can totally relate! Been there, done that… I’ll look forward to watching your progress!
Robin September 24, 2009 4:22 pm

I feel your pain! You are too funny and YES I get it!
Marie September 26, 2009 6:20 am

My sister, I think I’ll keep her. I have always admired you and your successes. You have had many that I am so proud of. I know and feel your struggle. But I also know when you put your mind to a project, you go above and beyond until it is like no other. Your new blog and website is the beginning, I feel, of your best project ever. You have inspired me to “refocus”. I, too, face this battle. My “confession” is that I finally reached my 10% this year (my first time ever) and let it slip away from me. Slowly creeping back up. But now, you and your website (and our great Saturday morning WW leader) have turned me around today. I look forward to next week’s weigh-in where there will be less of me showing up.
Lisa September 26, 2009 10:39 am

I guess it runs in the family, the weight thing. As I read Dar’s (a.k.a. Aunt Dar) blog I realized that I too need to get my Butt (BIG BUTT) moving, moving. I know that I need to lose weight, but gosh it can be so hard! I had all ready decided to get myself back on track last week. Last week I saw someone that I had not seen in a while and she had lost 50 pounds, now dont get me wrong I am happy for this person but the green eyed monster began to show its ugly head. I am hoping that this will motivate me along with the help of everyone else on this long and tuff journey. I also took a cue from Dar and dusted off my pedometer and hooked it on. And yes I also have a W by my size. One of my big confessions is I am addicted to REAL Sodas with lots of sugar in them.
Lisa September 26, 2009 8:54 pm

Small update I walked 5192 steps today, I guess this a a step in the right direction.
Dar September 27, 2009 9:45 am

Thanks for commenting everyone! Way to go Lisa! That’s a lot of steps!
Kelly September 27, 2009 11:03 am

We have struggled together over the years, my dear crazy aunt, and I too have become so freaking tired of the W after my size! I know I am a woman! I dont need that on my clothing tag to remind me! Although I have lost over 100lbs, I am at a stand still and I have so much more I need to loose. I have let things get in the way of my goal over the past few months. I have listened to that little voice inside your head that tells ya it is just a cookie.. go ahead and eat it.. its just one time! Well I have given into those little demons a few too many times and I have begun to slide back. That is not a vacation spot I want to visit again. So I too am back and ready to get going again. Lets do this thing! I am with ya! )
Shanta September 27, 2009 2:03 pm

Thanks for the blog. I too am a repeat offender (3rd time with Weight Watchers). They said the third time is the charm and I found myself successful this time thanks to a wonderful leader and commitment from myself. Love my Saturday 630 meetings, great group and very motivating. Dar thanks for sharing as we continue to battle together. Thanks for the yogurt info, will be going tomorrow to pick them up. YUMMY!
Catherine October 6, 2009 5:53 pm

Girl, I can so relate to you (me and a few thousand others!) I’m so glad i found your blog. Now I want you to read mine! I left a note on one of your other confessions. My format is different but my expeiences and feelings are so similar. Someday I am even going to write about my “mother’s day massacre” experience when a scrawny woman at a pot luck publicly humiliated me while my husband and I stood there like mute idiots!!!
Also, YES YOU CAN FEAR SUCCESS!!! I think that a part of us hides behind the annonymity of being fat, while another part hates ourselves for it. I am just now trying to take a good look at my changing self image, and it is very scary! Chaeck out my blog and get back to me if you fell simpatico.
http://ihatetof—ingdiet.blogspot.com/
Rhonda October 10, 2009 5:07 pm

OK, I definitely can relate. The lbs have been creeping on and I too needed that WW revival meeting to help me be accountable. Congrats on your 10% goal, hopefully I’ll reach mine this week. Hey you may not have lost a size yet but I bet your clothes fit much better!
Hey have you tried frozen grapes? Got the yogurt and coupon. I’ll let you know how I like it. Hmm, breakfast, cow toast with fiber one yogurt=1 point.
Good seeing you guys today. Do you get activity points for laughing?
Ayesha January 31, 2010 8:54 am

I think its not the actual success we fear but the step beyond that-life at a healthy weight-its the great unknown for many of us…
Dar February 2, 2010 8:43 pm

Wow, Ayesha I think you are right! I have to remember that one. Thanks for sharing!
sue thomason December 16, 2010 8:02 am

I’m a regular reader of your blog as I’m very interested in the effectiveness of dieting. I’d really love to hear if you are lighter or heavier than you were when you started your first ever diet?

I’m also interested in your views of the scientific research that suggests that dieting is a predictor of weight gain and that if you embark on a diet you’re more likely to end up fatter than if you don’t.

This is a contraversial topic, I know, but I think you’ll agree that it’s fascinating and getting the view of a serial dieter such as yourself, who is still very much into the practise of dieting, on the scientific evidence that contradicts the mainstream view would be ‘enlightening’.

Thanks for your blog, by the way, and for sharing your journey.

Sue